1. |
Eager
03:19
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If you had one last cigarette, would you light it up? Give me some? Paid for the room in cash for one last chance. And you have my mother’s eyes. They remind me of how she sang along to late era Neil Young in a company car bound for Chicago. I imagined a wedding day. In the pale light of some gray mountain, you with a grinning bride. I know the look, I’ve made it many times. Calling some kind of car. Calling some, call it something. It’s too easy to fall in love. It’s too easy to wear it off. You were my kind of man that night: the Stoic Drunk, the True Believer, mettle met, low and eager, just enough to get it back. If you had one last cigarette would you light it up and give me some? It’s too easy to fall in love. It’s too easy.
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2. |
16 Riders
03:05
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Soft, delicate, home in your arms like I could have been. 16 riders on a storm back then, a surefire way to get lost. Be honest. Be cool. Forget it. Fine, silhouette. Made up my mind cause you hadn’t yet. 16 riders on a storm I guess. Surefire way to get back. Be honest. Be cool. Forget it. It ain’t nothing but a wish it was. It ain’t nothing but a wish it was. Be honest. Be cool. Forget it.
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3. |
Mixed Bag
03:19
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It’s a mixed bag. I was cursing out the season. You were searching for a reason to be mad. Babe I got plenty of them. It’s a bad night, keeping Texas on the timeline. Made it easy to be leaving you behind—but I got what I want and it’s just enough. There was an east coast, there was a farm road, there was a five lane highway home. And it’s all right. Heavy hitters on the sideline. I know every single fight we’ve ever had, but I got what I want and it’s not enough. There was a phone call, there was a hotel bedroom bar, there was a five lane high-way home. There was a tongue tied drag, a hope that kept you trying, a five lane highway home. Taking the only side here was a hope that kept you higher. Drawing a line, making a plea . Yeah there was a phone call, there was a car that kept on driving, there was a five lane highway home. I was a big mood baby. There’s a part of me that’s lying. There was a five lane highway home.
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4. |
Moon Ahead
04:18
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There was a moment I was so young, running back like I couldn’t stop. I was right where my mother was: kinda drunk and making up for something. And for a moment I got caught. Better than that, I couldn’t shut up. Fighting all the ways I’m like my father every time you try to make it harder. I was young, it’s how it was and how it ended. And I could tell just how it felt by how you said it, with the moon ahead and the stars above me. And I was watching a shadow grow on the bedside before you woke up. I could see how you thought I was: acting and dumb and covering for someone. I was young. It’s how it was, it's how it ended. Gave it up but not enough to understand it, with the moon ahead and the stars above me. With the moon ahead and the stars. I want to know something. I want to be where you are. With the moon ahead, I should stop. I want to know something. I want to be where you are. I was young, it’s how it was and how it ended. And I could tell just what you meant by how you said it. I could touch what we had and what had happened. There it was: I was done, you wouldn’t let up. With the moon ahead and the stars above me, I want to know something. I want to be where you are.
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5. |
Ambitions
04:11
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Well the cars run on empty, made your hallways bare. And the fall wasn’t seasonally too hot to stand. Made your call to be perfect with the same old mistakes. I don’t worry about the future, I make my own path. You were right. You were right to call me out. I know I want to get back now. I want to make you nervous. All the time we had run out, turned around again. And that part of me shattered. I should feel something. I heard you sigh like you wanted but it was too dark even then. I should worry about the future. I see you there. And you were right. You were right to call me out. I know I want to get back now. I want to make you nervous. I want to make you nervous. I want to make you nervous. You were right to call me out, to bring me down.
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6. |
Easy Violence
02:21
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Had the bad dream of the jaguar come to kill me. Yeah It’s been a while. Saw the red sun, low and constant. Everything I’ve done, easy violence. Had the bad dream of the jaguar. Still the same scene. It means everything to me. Saw the red sun, low and constant. Everything I’ve done: blue and violet. And I was drunk, staying out too late at the White Horse, made a couple bad choices. Somehow I made it to the other side of town, blacked out, made it to the morning. Had the bad dream of the jaguar come to kill me. Sure, it’s been a little while. Saw his red teeth gleam in the silence. Everything I done: easy violence.
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7. |
John Prine
02:53
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I heard John Prine driving you home. I didn’t know what song it was, honest. I’m not messed up, I’m just falling asleep singing John Prine in the car. I had all night holding me back. I’ll have to forget what you said. And I’m not messed up, I’m just falling asleep. Me and John Prine in the car. Maybe I know that I’m holding on too late. Oh I know it’s hard for you to stand it any other way, because I know I'll be okay. I had been down in spite of myself. I saw the end come in and out finally. And I got messed up trying to leave you and John Prine in the car.
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8. |
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I’ve been burning sage almost every night, just to try it. I go back to the house I grew up in when it’s late, just to cry. Oh it’s dark and I’m tired, hoping to calm down for a little while. Holding on the edges of the darker side of town, lighting up the Hudson just for us. It’s all changing pace. Not even sure anymore how I ended up here. Crying like a baby in the middle of the night, you and I. I’m holding on the edges of the darker side of town, lighting up the hudson just for us. Because it’s dark, and it’s late, and I’m tired. It’s dark, and it’s late, and I’m tired. Holding on the edges of the darker side of town, I’m lighting up the Hudson just for us, hoping to calm down for a little while.
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9. |
Washington Square
03:25
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We were racing to Washington Square. And I can be the one or the one to drive, get us there on time. I remember what you said to me, cigarettes and listerine, on the bus back into the city: “you’ll know when I mean it.” Back when all the things to come hadn’t yet. We were two kids: broke, stupid, stumbling around in the dark. And I can be the one. I can be the future. I can try to take the shape. I remember what you said to me, licorice and wintergreen. Like a goddamn ghost of your mother, I know what you needed. Back when all the things to come hadn’t yet. Back when all that I had done didn’t seem so bad. And everything you wanted could be easy if you let it. You’re trying to get even when you’re trying to get better. Yeah everything you wanted could be easy if you let me in. You’re trying to get even when you’re trying to get better.
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10. |
Get Enough
03:23
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I wish the Beatles would get back together. I’m in Texas now. And it’s easy for me to get lonely when I love someone. It’ll all come down in an instant. I can feel it. I can almost taste it. Drag me down with the weight. It’s a drug. Do you get enough? Yeah the Beatles getting back together. Got to give the people what they want! And I swear I can’t take it like I used to. Come on, tell the truth. If it all comes down to forgiveness, can I feel it? Can I hear you say it? Drag me down with the weight. It’s a drug. I never get enough. Even the sky looks menacing. I stayed awake for 48 hours. And it’s all I can do to be lonely. Me and you. When it all comes down to an ending, I can feel it. I can almost save it. Drag me down with the weight. It’s a drug. I never get enough. I think I’m losing my mind. It’s a study for a painting.
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11. |
Texas
03:55
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I’m a demon. I’m a hellfire. You and me babe had a lot of fight. I’m a lot but I’m not that much. You’re a 5 am dream in an afterstorm. When the high beams hit, when I was still yours. You made laugh. You made me sad. How am I supposed to give you up? You keep breaking my heart. Texas. And the coffee burns slow and the colors burst, sinking low. Because I’m a mess but you’re already part of it. And how am I supposed to give you up now? How am I supposed to give you up now?You keep breaking my heart. Texas. If you wanna go now, I’m ready. It’s just the two of us, you and me, going heavy. Put a couple hundred down just to see. Because it’s you and me and you and me. How am I supposed to be now? You keep breaking my heart. Texas. You keep breaking my heart. How am I supposed to give you up?
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12. |
Lightning
02:48
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I thought I saw lightning over those hills. That or two passing headlights. When I woke in the morning there was nothing on the ground. Late in the evening, all dolled up like some mid-level manager, I watched through the window and caught you crying. Back when you and I headed west for Los Angeles. I thought I saw lightning over those hills, or something I can’t quite explain. I woke in the middle of the night, saw you lying there. Back when you and I headed south to your parent’s house. It was nothing I saw coming. All night lights got the radio calling: “carry on, bury it, like your mother did”
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Sun June Austin, Texas
~~~Bad Dream Jaguar~~~ out now on Run for Cover
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